pretty upset with myself for not doing the right thing!
must prioritise !

i do get jealous when i know that she is with someone -.-
gg...
oh well:) smile darrion!
as bryan state , a void at my heart that she have left.


★拿的起, 放的下 微笑 將屬於自己

smile!



super gg 0.-
really do not know what to say about my emotions.

quite piss with a particular thing!
let me do things with wisdom and not with my foolish authority!

i am glad. i am just glad that you are fine :)
and you have gave me alot ! thank you

What a foolish thought that have pass through my mind !
So foolish till i can ridicule myself.

this is my class!!got some not in there because they went off -.-
haha... it been awhile since i blog:)
well.. school is quite tiring but cool.. my new GOOD friend is shy and hid at the back -.-
haha..

watch (taken) and it is really a nice film!
(are you planning to sacrifice her) lady
(no i am willing to sacrifice anything for her)man
lol... these sentence capture my attention..
haha .. shall not be dishearten -.-
i am willing to sacrifice anything for her!
gg.

Went for the fellowship at the night and went to overnight at bryan house,he is so nice to let me sojourn for a night,get to know him more and deeper.lol. sound so gay 0,0
when we are about to sleep,intense pain come upon my left ribcage(till now also pain-.-)

I want to tell a certain person that she is going through alot in her life but no matter what i will be there for you.I believe everything came crashing down on you but is ok. GOD is with you till the end of the world(your life time)
jia you !!! do not ever ever give up on yourself.
Do not run from pressure but face it and you will become a greater person :)

Sorry if i have done anything that made you angry.






"all the best for your 1st day of school"
this sentence made me happy :)

My mum gave me so little pocket money and rebuke me for my untidiness.
These add on to my burden. I can say that my mind is like in the whirlwind, so confused and uncertain.I love her still but i am not obliged to love her,i have no right because i am unable to give her happiness.
I want to be the one comforting her when she cry, i want to be the one to lend her a shoulder when she need.I want to be the pillar she rely on, encourage her when she fall.
Lift her up when she need the push, pushing her to the greater length.
Make her smile and laugh when she is bored. Accompany her to go all over the world.
Bring her to places where it will elate her.
Saying i love you and i love you and i love you and i love you till death set us apart.
Propose to her at the place that is exotic,wearing the ring for perpetual.
My life is in the mess without you texting me,loving me,hugging me and occasionally letting me to savour your lips.
I want to marry you and i meant it :( I really do, i still have so much to do with you,getting married,have a family with two kids ( a boy and a girl)although you yourself do not want to have any due to the pain.
it been 15 days since we broke up, it been so awkard with my life,without you, i just felt something missing, something that is important have departed from my life.
The last words you told me when we broke off, made me cry so badly when i was on my way home.I never thought we will end up in this state,even though we love each other so deeply.
In the past during our cold war which is at most a week,it end up me msging you because i can never never take it being without you loving me. I always sound so weak but i really do miss you so much.If i am given a opportunity to hug you and have you. I will never let you go away from me. I will stick to you for the rest of my life.
I am aware that you are very angry and resent me alot which can be seen by your defensive side.I am not him, i am really not. I am different, i do love you from the start and till now i still love you. I am sorry,you know my character right?where i am so insensitive with my words when i am hot headed.Please do forgive me.



i am elated that you are being encourage by some friends, at least i know you are fine without me. I am happy for you :)
Is never good to have a nasty emotion. I will want you to feel nothing for this relationship
so you will be able to go through life.BEING HAPPY IS ALL THAT MATTERS.
I believe without me life can be ever greater for you. I brought pain to your life and i am aware of it. My wish is coming true, you are happy and you are perfectly fine.
I know i am so ugly in the inside and maybe outside and i just feel so ugly in the inside. I hate myself,i despice myself.

I believe you can find someone that love you ever more than i could. I want you to have the best of everything! The best of everything in life!
The best love you can ever obtain!

i believe i am not fit to be your lover.

i am so foolish by losing my cool during my previous post, i cannot believe that sometime when i get hurt i will retaliate back that harshly. Darrion is a mean guy. I gave a thought over everything. Well let me say about how i feel ok? i thought that you never really care and do not feel a prick in the heart but i am really wrong about everything after i read your blog. I seriously believe you are the one being hurt the most.It is my miscalculation after all...
i want to sincerely apologize to ho been ting for hurting her over and over again ever after we have part our way.

i can tell you that you are the best girl i ever met for the 17 years of my life. i want to thank you for everything. The tender love you gave to me once and i can tell you that i loved and love you the most during my life for this 17 years.

Forgive me for my transgression. I have been a bad boyfriend.

THIS is my blog and i believe i am fit enough to say how i feel in my blog...YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO MANIPULATE ME ANYMORE!!!!!


i am freaking conflicted by your words......i have my rights to place any picture i want... since you are so keen to end this relationship of ours... 2 years and 17 days...then go ahead
it do not mean anything to you from the start?
well it doesnt! so thank you for your lies and everything, stating that you love me but you do not. Whole chunk of shits?
SO overwhelm by it!
YEA i am a freaking jerk :) i will get away from your life since whatever i say you feel that i am always pushing the blame to you.
Is like whatever!

stop trying to log into my account and change without my permission is freaking irritating! well you do not have a hold anymore since i have change the password.



i do not hate you and i cant bring myself to !

Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
hey!=)
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
you okay?
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
eh
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ok with
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
?
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
-.-
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
yr emotion?>
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
ben ting?
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
-.-
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
died
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
-.-
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
lol
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
miss her alot lo
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
ok.
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
we are with you k?
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
haha
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
yea
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
God is always with you.
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
loving you.
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
aware of it and appreciate it plenty
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
=)
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
amen
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
haha
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
how are you
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
sot fun
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
?
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
i am fine
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
just need to crucify my flesh
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
discpline
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
sleep early wake up early and not sleep in class!
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
h ah aha ha
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
haha
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
still do not want to turn in
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
?
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
yup
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
soon
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
it been nearing two wks that i come online
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
ha ha aha
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
sleeping soon
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
tmr long day!
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
haha
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ya
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
long long day
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
haha
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
so cool
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
can go
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
i also want to go sot too
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
ya man!
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
must must
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
life changing
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
so cool
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
haha
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
mar
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
yup yup.
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
got more anoiting already
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
lol
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
erm
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
its only second wk
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
ha ha ah
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
need GOD more la
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
lol
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ya
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
i also need
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
le
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
very dry
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
and worn out
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
take some time to wait on God
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
let Him fill and refresh you k?
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
i will keep you in prayer! fresh oil from heaven1
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
thanks mar
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
i need it alot
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
to recharge me to go on
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
yup.
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
sleep early..
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
and help more people
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
tmr wakes up early to seek God
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
our calling is to God
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
not jsut mionistry
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
ministry
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ok
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ya
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
fellowship with HIM too right
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
yup.
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
=)
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
sleep early tonight k?
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
i gtg...tmr need to wake up at 5.50am!
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ok
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
night
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
sleep well
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
ha ha ha. nite.tks darrion for being a disciple of GOD
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
one life lets live it
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
my pleasure
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
yeas
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
God will gives you wat you need
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
strength ,anointing and wisdom
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
amen
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
haha
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
okokie. i gtg......
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ok
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
bye
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
nite. bye.
Prayer is the key to everything you need ! ! says:
anything msg me
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
ok
130307 to 300309.... love story ened says:
:)



sometime mar says thing that made me go over the moon

1. 
   
   joke of the pic... dar dar saving a girl that is falling from the pole?

lol...


ok... went to witness the solemn matrimony....
and well it is great ?
my mum remarried and i am part of the english man world :X haha.. i got the "blood" now,
so will be consider pretty attractive :X
lol...
and during the ceremony, guess what,my mum phone rang -.-
it was during the man hosting for the matrimony.
took some picture and went to eat!
totally famish after the whole day and i order a huge meal!!!
gobbled down the food
so not glamorous,oh well.
haha.. went to meet bryan,andy, cheryl,vanessa and mei man.
took some pictures and my precious andy and mei man went off -.-
so left me,bryan,cheryl and vanessa...
we have to hang out with treacherous ladies :X
went to catch a movie,shijiku incident. I suppose this in the spelling.
A jackie chan film! Is quite a disheartening movie :( love is painful. lol

went to eat mos burger after that, then cheryl start a personal test on every one..
question 1 ) ans) from darrion from van from bryan
who will you go with to a forest? -mei man? -bf? -yea kai?


question 2) which animal will you ans) owl ? fox? bird?
see?


question 3) ans)a hut? haunted castle?
what type of house will you see house?


question 4 )
what will you see on the table of ans)a candle? nothing? keys?
house?



question 5)
what will you see at the back of ans)lake lake? river
the house ? a lake ,river or sea





ok
so answer is revealed!
1st question
is the lover of your life ...
mine is abit funny -.-i chose her because i have to put on a brave front so will not die earlier in the forest =.-
which shows that bryan is gay =.-
van is -.- not specific


2nd question it show the personality of your so called lover -.-
and mei man is really a owl =.- that sleep really late at night
van bf should be a cunning one?
bryan. yea kai like freedom
-.-




3rd question shows
what type of relationship are you after?
mine is a simple one.. bryan is demanding ?
van is scary relationship?
lol


4rd question show
what type of personality are you..
i am romantic?quite true ?
van is nothing -.-
bryan is the one wants to be in control maybe?



5th question shows that
how much are you willing to love -.-
mine and van is not alot but willing to love long...
bryan is a river-.-
lol

so
well very hilarious -.-









i missed you alot...
i wish i can still be together with you
dear. i hope you love me still?

woo was suppose to blog yesterday but delayed till now..
Was ushering and someone felt that i am fierce looking when i aproached her,terrible...
I have to wear a wide smile to serve and is tiring to smile all day long but i guess is unto the Lord :) amidst of serving,power of GOD just flow through me.That is indeed a great feeling i have.
During service... a choir sang the song.(If i love it will be forever, if i give my heart it will be all)
these lyrics arrest my attention. Was thinking of you.
pastor preached about love busters and one of the love busters are annoying habits, where pastor kong state that in the past he will shake his leg whatever he does, counselling , eating, talking , praying , basically almost everything until one day sun ( his wife ) rebuke him by saying is irritating can you stop !
It brought into remembrance of me and her where she will feel pissed by the annoying action i done . This thought led me to a smile and i miss it alot.

Dennis heard the news and he said 'what the f***" then i am like -.- "you do not have to use that word .Train home with dennis and he ask why do i still wear the ring and offer to help me throw than i am like "are you nuts no way i am going to give to you! '
haha.. I told mei man this and she ask a profound question "you are still waiting for her right ?"
and i gave a profound answer "yes "
of course i am!!! hilarious and i told her that human beings are quite retard , where people cherish after losing it.Which i am wearing the watch she gave,can you believe it ! darrion hate wearing watch is wearing it and enjoying it alot! I found out that i love the watch alot !


Met up with wen shen ,i z, and hl.
Ate and chat!
When i first stepped in , wenshen disturbed me all the way.-.-
Had a good time with them.


Jab and i chatted for awhile..
talking about eyecandy...opps i do have -.-
no la.. I have to deal with my emotional baggages first . Have phobia of woman or girl